I spent the weekend visiting my mother again. We didn’t do a ton, but somehow I was busy. Overall, I had two takeaways I wanted to reflect on.
My mother is working on clearing out the house, but at her pace, and under her conditions.
This is great, better than her refusing to let anything go. But it means she is trying to find homes for all the things she is willing to part with.
Grown children of her friends are the beneficiaries of some very nice kitchen items. My sister is taking some very nice kitchen pots as well.
I myself did some “shopping” at home this weekend. I plan to come home with some extra table cloths, and to put aside some more fragile things that I don’t want to check through with my luggage.
A number of items on her give-away table are things I remember from my childhood: previously used, superseded by a new and preferred option, but kept “just in case.” I can see how that could build up and lead to a more cluttered home, but it’s somewhat easy to get rid of this stuff; after all, one has already decided they aren’t making the cut for regular use.
However, a number of items she is willing to give away have never been used. Pans still in the box: For just in case? It looked like a deal? I might use it as a gift? A beautiful china tea set, never unwrapped.
And yet, here she is 10 or 20 years later, ready to get rid of these never-opened boxes.
I think the lesson I want to take away (again) is to use the good stuff, and give away the stuff I don’t want to keep.
Now I just need to put that into practice.
During this time, I did get out for some walks, and surprised myself by walking through some woods I had never been through before.
[We have some state woodlands in the neighborhood. They seemed huge when I was growing up, but they really aren’t. I think it’s a swath about 2 blocks wide and maybe 1/2 mile long, which encompasses a stream and some surrounding trees.]
I had a lovely time walking along a path near the local grade school, peering over the hill at the stream and rhododendrons.
I’m sad that I never wandered in these woods as a kid. I guess I was too… what? Worried about getting lost? Getting dirty?
Today I didn’t worry at all about that, though probably I should have been a bit more concerned about who I might meet in the trees. There have been a number of bear sightings over the summer.
Anyway, I think, again, my lesson from this weekend is carpe diem.
Wander the woods, use the nicer pans, enjoy the table cloths.
Use the good stuff and give away what you don’t want to keep. I love this. It’s so hard for people to part with stuff, though. I have a few things in my china cabinet that were given to us as wedding gifts, and we’ve never used them in 30 years! Things like crystal bowls. They’re beautiful but pottery is so much more practical. 😂 And I am a practical gal!
Trust me, I am struggling with this myself.