It’s a funny thing, jewelry.
If you think about it rationally, you’ll have to agree that it is expensive and a poor investment. Like a car, the price of almost any piece you might buy drops as soon as you take it home.
On the other hand, jewelry has been coveted and valuable for thousands of years. It can help dress up an outfit, start a conversation, or just straight up signal wealth and status. If you like a piece, it can work for you for many decades, unlike a car or cell phone, which is unlikely to last more than one or two.
I have to confess, I was able to accumulate plenty of jewelry over the years as gifts. My mother (who loves this stuff) has given me plenty of lovely pieces, especially for special birthdays (16, 18) and graduations.
Earrings are easy presents for birthdays/holiday/souvenirs. I have given and received a number from girlfriends and relatives.
Of course, who can forget the tradition of the engagement ring and wedding ring. I suppose I decided on my wedding ring, but my fiance picked out the engagement ring; we looked at rings together, but he made the final choice himself and surprised me.
It was therefore an odd event for me, last year, when I decided I was going to buy something expensive for myself.
I had earned a large bonus, and although we planned to put most of it towards paying off the mortgage, I felt a desire to commemorate the achievement with something physical. We were off to Greece, and I thought it would be nice to have a combination souvenir and trophy.
My original thought was to spend 10% of the bonus, inspired by The Physician Philosopher’s post. It seemed like an eminently rational amount to spend on an indulgence.
I made a plan, and had a budget. Nevertheless I found myself very anxious. This was all very strange: spending a large sum of money on something frivolous. For myself. When I had never bought anything like this before ($30 earrings didn’t count!).
In the end, I couldn’t bring myself to spend that much money on a small item. Jewelry is pretty, but oh-so-easily misplaced!
I remember on the interview trail, many years ago, one of the female physicians telling me about buying a pearl necklace with her first paycheck. I could see she felt proud about using her own money to buy it for herself.
I thought it odd then, but now–as a breadwinner with competing uses for her money–I feel inspired that women can use our money, that we earn, to adorn ourselves. No need for a man or someone else to decide that we have been good and deserve a present. [Note to spouse, this does not mean I will turn down a present if you want to give me one!]
I don’t wear my prize often. It isn’t particularly representational, like a flower or an animal. People have asked me “what is it?” and so far, I have just shrugged the question off, and said it is a souvenir.
But inside, I know that it is a symbol: of my hard work, of the excellence of my efforts, of owning my money (and choosing how to spend it). It reminds me that I work hard and can support myself, and inspires a little pride in my own accomplishments.
Something that no one else can give me, that I can only give myself.
N.B. The jewelry pictured above is all from the Metropolitan Museum of Art, and is not from my personal collection.