Right now, I love my bed.
There is little I enjoy more during the 5,000th day at home, than sliding into my collection of freshly cleaned sheets, deluxe pillows with just the right degree of softness, and my personal comforter.
Before the pandemic, Mr. PiN and I would sometimes consider the merits of going away for the weekend, and decide to stay home because our house, mostly our bed, was just too luxurious to leave. Now that we cannot leave, we are very happy to have the current sleeping set-up already arranged.
However, I was not planning to write a whole post about how lovely the bed is. More, I was thinking about the financial issues that affected how we built this treat we get to enjoy nightly.
Starting Out
Taking on debt for a want. Or was it a need?
When Mr. PiN and I got married, financially I was tapped out. Stretched. Just about searching the couch cushions for quarters.
I had just bought a house. That always sees a huge outflow of money in addition to the price of the house: closing costs, movers, realizing that utilities cost more in a house than an apartment (especially if you mistakenly keep paying at your apartment instead of changing your online billing…).
Getting married cost money: rings, dinners, multiple trips to and from family for dress fittings, a license, etc. Not cheap.
There was a kid to send to college. He had support from other members of the family, but still, there were things here and there to provide.
With all that, we had no business spending more on a bed until we could afford it.
And yet… we had a hard time sleeping well on the 20 year old double mattress I’d been using. (His bed wasn’t even a consideration.)
It seemed like a bad way to start a marriage, unable to sleep the night through. (OK, if newlyweds can’t sleep the night through for other reasons, that’s one thing. But it shouldn’t be because they wake each other up every time someone turns over.)
We decided a larger mattress was a priority for us. An investment in our new marriage.
We went to a major department store, shopped for mattresses, and found a king sized set we thought would work. It cost, as I remember, $2000. Maybe not a crazy amount, but more than we had available after paying for all the other things we had bought over the prior months.
For once in my life, I bought a consumer good on credit knowing that I couldn’t pay it off by the end of the month.
The nice department store was happy to let me open up a credit card, with the option of no interest for payments for 15 months. That’s not quite the same as a 0% credit card: if the thing wasn’t paid off by the end, I’d be back-charged interest from the date of purchase. However, I felt confident that if I wasn’t going to buy another house and get married again, I could pay off the purchase before the due date.
In fact, I think I was able to pay it off within 6 months, well before the end of the loan.
Gifts to the rescue!
Still, here we were with a mattress and box spring and nothing to put on it.
Sheets for a king sized bed are not cheap.
Luckily, we did receive gifts at our wedding. My best friend from college gave a bed-in-a bag set (thanks, V!), so we didn’t have to sleep on the bare mattress. Friends and family gave gift cards to home goods stores, so I bought some new pillows.
We also didn’t have a bed frame. For that, we were able to acquire a hand-me-down from my parents, along with the matching side tables. We still use them today (those are even more expensive than sheets!)
And that was it for a while. We had one set of sheets, so we had to make darned sure to start laundry early enough in the day to make the bed in time for the evening.
Eventually, a few years later, I had received a raise and we had savings. We had a little room in the budget to think about a better set of linens
Reflections
Sometimes timing trumps planning. That is to say, we could have been fiscally responsible and waited six months to save up the money for our new mattress. However, I can guarantee we would have been a cranky, sleep-deprived couple for most of those 6 months. Taking on a little debt in this case was a great investment in our marriage. I say this because it was–in our case–a manageable amount, something that could have been cash-flowed under normal circumstances.
You don’t always have to do everything yourself. I realize that not everyone has a supportive family and friends, but most people have some sort of social network. While sponging off of them shouldn’t be a financial plan, it is also true that the people who love you will want to help you out, especially for special occasions. Asking for gifts you need, or using gift cards to pay for what you want, is totally OK.
Hand-me-downs can be great. Mattresses and bedding, especially if you have allergies, aren’t necessarily the best items to source used. However, wooden furniture works out really well as hand me downs. They can save you a lot of money, and sometimes you really are doing someone a favor by helping them clear out their attic.
Upgrading Life, On Sale
A few years later, Mr. PiN commented for the third time how much he liked the sheets at my parents’ house. They were rather comfortable, and seemed softer than the ones we had.
I asked my mom, and she told me where she got them (Cuddledown<–not an affiliate link, but I think you will be happy to buy from them), and I looked up the price. Ulp! With a kid in college and perfectly functional sheets at home, we weren’t getting a set any time soon.
But then–two months before college graduation, my mom let me know the company was having their annual sale. 30% off. Our monthly support to our student would be over very soon.
Reader, we bought the sheets.
Reflection
Your budget will change over time. I never would have thought to buy these sheets when we were first married. I thought they were much too expensive. However, with a raise in pay and a reduction in expenses, suddenly they seemed much more affordable.
Another way of saying this: It is OK to inflate your lifestyle, when you can afford it.
Lifestyle Inflation, One Item at a Time
The sheets were a real upgrade, and kept us happy for a while.
After a few years, we replaced our worn-out pillows with newer (and nicer) ones.
Then we went traveling, and in Vienna learned how comfortably we slept with separate comforters. I decided to buy a solo comforter for Mr. PiN; we liked it so much, it was soon followed by one for me.
Our deluxe bed had been assembled.
Reflection
Your wants change over time. When we were first married, it never would have occurred to us to buy the expensive sheets, the fancier pillows, or separate covers. It wasn’t until we tried each option that we realized how much we liked it. Waiting a bit to get “the expensive stuff” lets you learn more about what you like and don’t like. So that you spend the money on things you know you will really love, and use.
Goals
Though we love our bed as it is, nothing lasts forever. Sheets get torn in the wash (I’m looking at you, dryer filter!), pillows age, as do mattresses.
Our mattress set is getting to the end of its life span. Though we still enjoy a good night’s sleep, I think we will soon be at the point where a new mattress will be necessary. I hear these go on sale at various holidays, including Memorial Day.
On the other hand, when we were on our honeymoon, we enjoyed a feather bed. Looking at the cost, and our penchant for drinking coffee in bed, I didn’t feel ready to buy one early on. However, I see that they are cheaper than a full mattress set, and may help us put off the purchase of a new mattress set a bit longer. Could it be that we could improve things further, with the lower cost option?
Decisions, decisions. These choices, no matter what we choose, will cost a pretty penny.
I think Mr. PiN and I will sleep on it for a bit.
Do you have a splurge that was totally worth it to you?